bewiLdereD

What is this feeling I have?
I seem to love you
But other times I seem to loathe you
I can't be without you
Or maybe just without anyone
I think about you all the time
But why do I have this feeling?
I waited long for your voice
And I would die to hear your laugh
But is this love
Or merely I'm scared to be alone?

My knees start to shake,

When you’re in sight.

My mind is filled with wonder,

My heart with fright.

When will this feeling stop?

When did it start?

How can I listen to my mind,

Without breaking my heart?

I’m so confused.

What should I do?

I can’t think of anything except you.

Should I ignore you,

Or just give it time?

I can’t think straight,

My heart controls my mind.

.::it'S jusT a drEam::.

I dreamed of a love

a love so true

and then from above

God sent you

When our eyes met

I turned away

Only to regret

That grateful day

I search in the dark

To find that key

That triggers the spark

You put in me

I want you to see

That my love is true

Even though we can't be

I still hold my true love for you.

Sitting in the dark tonight

Alone in my corner of the world

I can't see the light

I want to be your girl

Or do I? I don't know...

I really have no clue

I feel like I have no where to go

Because I'm so in love with you

Miles separate us

And so I thought I didn't have to yearn

I thought I could escape the lust

God, I have so much to learn

I've been living a lie

I wish I was yours, still

I pretended I haven't wished that, by and by

But in my heart I know I always will

I can't come out and tell

How I dream about you every night

My life seems like a living hell

Because without you it isn't right

I want to just call you mine

And let you hold me close

But I've got to give this time

I want your love the most

You seem so angry sometimes

And I wish I could kiss it away

But to my morals that would be a crime

Yet I wish it every day

It seems like you are so distant

I want to tell you how I feel

But it's impossible, I can't

You wouldn't take me for real

So I sit here in the dark

Quiet but screaming inside

On my heart you've left your mark

My heart backs down to my pride

Someday I'll let you know

That I hold this secret within

But now I'll let our friendship grow

Then with that we can begin

Tonight I'll simply dream

That you are mine to be

I'll smile at us as a team

Then wake to reality

Where nothing is going well

Where I'm lonely without you

I caught you when you fell

Now I fall... what do you do?

UnnoticeD

She is lonely

Even though you can't tell

She is reaching out

For what, she doesn't know

She will continue to sit in silence

And hope that someone may stumble across

Her and all of her emptiness

But they only hope that they do it in time

Otherwise she will have drifted too far

And she may let go

Of whatever grasp of the world she has

As she slowly fades out of the lives of everyone

Nearly unnoticed.

LifE

maybe If I go away I can figure out
what my life's supposed to be and what it's all about

maybe if I go away I can finally tell
what it is that I can't do and what I can do well

maybe if I go away I can break the mold
of what I've seen and what I've done and all that I've been told

maybe if I go away I can then be sure
of what I want less of and what of I want more

maybe if I go away I can understand
what I should let go of and what I should demand

maybe if I go away I can learn to be
fine with being me, when me is half of we

maybe if I go away I can leave behind
the life that I have here and explore another kind

maybe if I go away I can seek what's true
but just for me and not for him and not for her or you

maybe if I go away I can find a way
to express myself each day and say what I want to say

maybe if I go away I can soon unhack
a way to make 'going away' a way of coming back

a girL's smiLes

This girl she's crying inside

But everyone see is smiles

This girl she's hurting inside

She lived like this for quite a while

Always hiding her pain inside

She won't ruin everyone's smile

This girl she's breaking down inside

But all she does is smile...

Through those eyes deep inside

Holds a lot of misery

Playing pictures from her mind

Showing her past, her history

She doesn't want to remember

But the pictures continues to play...

Every night she prays

Wishing them away

But this girl lies with her laugh

And hides behind her smile

So no one can see her pain,

Her past, her denials

This girl she's dying inside

Although no one may see her pain,

Just continues to smile bright

From day to everyday

This girl whom I love so deep

Cries behind her eyes

But everyone ever see

Is blinded with a lie...

With her beautiful smile she gives

For everyone to see

Anyone and everyone

Anyone but me.